Farewell, Delicious Food!

It’s 10 minutes to midnight and even though I am absolutely exhausted (what happened to my long weekend? Is it possible to get 3 more days off to recover?), I am forcing myself to stay awake and consume as many chips, peeps, chocolates and glasses of pepsi as I possibly can without puking. I don’t even feel like eating, but this is my last hurrah, my goodbye to gluttony. Soon, I will be a new woman kindofsortofIhope.

Cointrin and I are doing a Biggest Loser-style weight loss competition for 40 days and 40 nights starting tomorrow. It’s going to be just like that time Jesus hung out in the desert resisting the temptation to make bread for the devil or whatever… only this is going to be harder. Do you know how addicted I am to sugary junk food? Do you?! On bad days, I have considered trading my MacBook, my pride and joy – my Gateway to the Internet, for half a chocolate bar and a sip of cola.

Since Cointrin and I decided to do this challenge last Wednesday, I have been saying farewell to candy, chips, chocolate, calorie-laden drinks, extra large chai teas with 3 creams and 4 sugars, fast food, etc., etc. by eating as much as I can hold, and then eating some more. I am so ready!

The truth is, I’m sick of gorging myself on copious amounts of high-sugar, high-fat foods. Don’t get me wrong – it hasn’t stopped me from being a total pig – but I don’t ENJOY it like I used to. I am actually looking forward to this weight loss competition. I don’t know what the stakes are (some as yet undetermined humiliation), I’m not quite sure how I’m going to do it, but I’m pretty confident I can kick Jer’s ass (That’s right. I said it. IT’S ON!!). 

I love doing this self-betterment crap with Mr. Cointrin. We gave up soft drinks this past Lent, and both of us managed to go over our set goal of 40 days. I could never give up food just for the sake of being thinner or more healthy. I need some kind of horrible and embarrassing consequence (besides being overweight which, really, isn’t that big of a deterrent) to motivate me. I am so thankful that Cointrin is willing – dare I say enthusiastic? – to go along with my hairbrained schemes and distract me from the actual work of getting fit. I love you, Jeremy, and I am going to crush you like a bug! 

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